The Last Supper

was packing my drawer just recently, a mess due to the maddening work that has been thrown onto me.. found the notebook which I used while I was in Japan, and look through it, just to relive some of the memories (although most of the notes are like.. “study jap!”, “do lit as hist essay” or “kanji test tmr~” haha.. ) towards the end, I found the few pages which I wrote when I was on the plane back to Singapore..

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We arrived pretty late back in Tokyo last night because our flight from Asahikawa was only at 815pm. Parting with laura seemed weird.. before this trip to hokkaido, I don’t really know her at all.. I have seen her around, but the only time we went out together as a group was probably to… gHibLi museum? yeah.. and at that time, I don’t think we spoke much at all.. not that we spoke much either during this 7days, but the fact that we traveled together made me feel we are like a gang~ she seem a really nice person, with a good sense of humour (actually I think this is something all 7 of us have, ok.. maybe not ian~ haha..) so even though I only know her for a short time, 多多少少 will be sad..

when we reach back plumeIS dorm, we still had to repack our luggage abit cuz we bought quite a “few” things from hokkaido.. haha.. plus the fact that we had really late lunch at around.. 4pm? that’s why our dinner turned into a supper lo.. haha..

we ate at a restaurant nearby their dorm and headed off to a sleepless night of karaoke, yeah! it’s the 2nd time we did such a thing, the other time was like.. a day after we arrived back from nikko? yeah~ the time after we viewed the はなび at 浅草.. just that too bad this time yu didn’t join us.. cuz she was feeling ねむい, plus she hadn’t been feeling well throughout hokkaido, or even much before that, and she wanted to see us all off the next day.. so I guess she really need the rest ba..

throughout the k-ing, I was kinda pre-occupied with other things on my mind.. not that it wasn’t fun.. it was! just that I was distracted with my watch, keep stealing glances at it.. hoping with every glance I take, time would just move a fraction slower, or stop at best.. but dawn came sooner than I expected.. and the time to part was here..

we reached back at their dorm at close to 6am in the morn, and their grumpy, impossible resident manager saw us at the entrance. And since ian and I don’t actually stay there, he didn’t allow us to go in and collect our にもつ. In the end, the gals had to move our stuff from leona’s room for us. What an ass!

as we waited along the pavement, exchanging parting wishes, naturally, the gals got more emotional, esp amy, and started sobbing uncontrollably. 还跟我说不会哭呢~ =p
you know, I just so hate saying goodbyes. For the whole week in hokkaido, in between the crazy fun things we do, the long hours of driving, the sleeping pictures we took, the beautiful sceneries of intimidating mountains, vast oceans or swarm of moths, I have been bracing myself for this very moment. Every single moment I took my mind and eye off what’s in front of me, I get depress because I think of this parting day. And im glad to say I stayed strong throughout the goodbyes..

Well, throughout the wait for the taxi with the 3 of them (minchu n ian got into another cab first), we didn’t really say anything. There was so much to be said, yet, I was speechless. So many words of concern to be said, so much feelings to be conveyed, yet I was unable to express myself. I hated myself there and then.

I went to Narita T2 first to check in one of my luggages with minchu and ian cuz I have a feeling my luggage would be overweight.. =p but who knows, I give them 1 luggage liao still have excess baggage of 5kg wor.. and I have to pay for it lo.. damn SIA! have some common sense lah.. I have been here for 4months for study.. and u give me a mere 25kg?! *angry*

so I slowly pay lo.. give them all my coins.. just saving about 200yen in case I wanna buy drinks.. I took my own sweet time to walk around the airport but I was still kinda early, finding myself at the gate almost 15mins earlier than boarding time. So I sat myself just in front of the ceiling high window, over-looking the huge planes with the impressive greenery and the great blue sky peppered with clouds as a backdrop.

It was only then, that I realized that I was going to leave japan already. I think back of the life that I had here, what I would not see anymore when I get back to Singapore. I think about the friends I am leaving behind, the friends I would not see anymore when I return. Although maybe for them, I might not mean as much, but to me, they mean a lot. I don’t think I did a good job in expressing that, but I just hope they know how I feel.

Even on the plane just now, whilst watching movies, I could feel tears swelling up, (im quite sure its not because the terrorist blew up a plaza in Salamanca in Vantage Point) because it really kinda hit me strongly. 今日分离何時才能再相遇？ Although minchu, ian and I played around with the idea of going Australia next year as like a grad trip (so we can visit leona and yu~), it wouldn’t be the whole gang yah? amy and laura probably won’t make it.. on the train to the airport, we spoke of meeting in 5yrs’ time, at some country, probably Japan would be fitting, because this was where we started. Even though people would say it’s a childish idea, I really hope we can do it. It’s like.. so.. soo.. fairytale-like? 7 people from different background first meet in a foreign country, made a promise to meet again X years later.. awww… fun yah? =p

But even now, as I am on the plane back to Singapore, I know reality awaits me. My last yr in uni would be hectic, academically even though im not doing any HYP. And the added responsibilities I have from soccer.. I can no longer miss too many trainings.. This year we are in a particularly difficult group.. I don’t want people to remember my year as the year that didn’t made it to the top 4.. im really worried.. not forgetting the fact that I have to worry about my future.. *sigh*

For now, I will just lift the memories I had in japan, carefully, slowly into a box, 小心翼翼地把它合起来, tuck them into a corner, so that when I reminisce about it again, I can remember everything about it, for this is the best 4 months I’ve ever had in my life.

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As of now, i have a giant mountain of work to be done on my desk and im pretty worried about getting them done, tho im more worried about the grp projects.. i don't like people to think i don't do much work to contribute to the proj (bad experience in nm3216: game design). But i guess i should be fine? i like the way steph puts it..

"keep pushing! i mean, you climbed mt.fuji, surely you can climb a mountain of work~"

So, tmr onwards (actually since monday), i have decided to commit more time to do more wrk, because of the impending wrk ahead of me. the last few weeks i've been slacking quite abit.. can't blame me! i had a very frantic start to the semester~ so i probably won't be blogging for some time (and for that matter, sorry if im replying ur emails/facebook msgs late!). anyway, there's not much more to say about my life since coming back to Singapore. Everyday is wake up, attend lessons, soccer training/matches, do labs/assignments/projects, sleep. Occasionally get to go out walk walk, eat good food, watch movies..

well, hope everyone is well! =)